You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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