so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
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