we're blogging at a bar
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
you traded sex for a burrito?
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
