clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Randomize
