It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
Dude, this chick just tossed my salad hard. All that I could picture was a dog trying to get the last of the peanut butter out of the jar of Jiff and trying not to think of how grotesque my last dump was.
Then she tried to kiss me and I wouldn't and she got pissed off and went to sleep. Then about an hour later, her kid called her. She went home and on the way out I told her to wash her mouth before she kissed her kid good night. Weird night..
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
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