Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
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