She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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