i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Randomize
