Cold hands, warm shart.
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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