Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
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