They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
is it fun? or sober?
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
Randomize