I didn't shave. On purpose
I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
areolas are like halos for boobs.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize
