two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
