i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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