where am i from again
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
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his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
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I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
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