Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
His nipple licking is glorious
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