You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
You can't special order awesome
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
