You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
