Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Randomize
