she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
