does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Too much gin, very little bucket
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up