my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Randomize
