Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
This beer is not sobering me up at all
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
Randomize
