Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
I'm both gender and math confused
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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