Nicole vs. Life
if i died would you start the facebook group?
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
