all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
