READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Randomize