Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
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