His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
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