You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
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