No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
I queefed so loud it echoed.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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