C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
