Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
