wakey wakey hands off snakey
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize
