if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Randomize
