No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
