can u get pink eye on your cock?
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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