i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
