Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Randomize
