I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
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