After last night, I could never be a politician.
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Randomize