Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Randomize