I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
