you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Randomize
