We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
