I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
how drunk are you?
Several
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
