Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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