just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
try to milk me bitch
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