Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
Randomize
