I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
Come over? It's my birthday
How many times has that text failed you tonight?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
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