ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Randomize
